Monday, July 2, 2012


Guuuuuuys! Guess what! I'm finally back!
I have a few requests from facebook, so I'm starting with them first, leaving my wishlist behind *cries*
No, seriously, again I enjoy requests more than the songs I chose myself, what is this sorcery!?
To be honest, I'm not too familiar with Buck-Tick's general style, but this song is amaaaaziiiing

However, I'm taking a different approach on this one. I won't do it line to line, but I will analyze the song as a whole, since, honestly, there are so many connected things in it I don't even know how to analyze part by part.

Generally, an intro to my interpretation:
If you're familiar with Eroguro style, you probably know some of Edogawa Rampo's stories or have watched some movies inspired by or done as adaptations of Rampo's works. The one I watched, Rampo Noir, has a story Crawling Bugs included in it (it's the last one), and the moment I saw the lyrics to this song, they reminded me of the story. For those who don't know what I'm talking about, here's in short (from some website I can't find now o.O so it was written in one of Rampo Noir online reviews, not by me):
"Crawling Bugs: The story centers around a chauffeur named Masaki (again played by Tadanobu Asano) who becomes obsessed with one of his famous passengers, stage actress Fuyu Kinoshita (Tamaki Ogawa). Masaki is a certified Mysophobe (hates germs & dirt) and gets a nasty rash on his neck when he touches people. Seeing as he is madly in love with Fuyu but can't exactly touch her, he figures a way round this by killing her and taking her home to live with him?! This has to be my second favorite entry as it has some of the most surreal imagery -an almost hallucinogenic set-piece in Masaki's home (mind?) where he paints the dead actress multicolors then unsuccessfully tries to inject her with embalming fluid, resulting in a bloodbath. Plenty of black humor here too - when the police burst into Masaki's apartment he calmly pulls his head free from the rotting belly of his 'lover' and says "what?''. "  
 The things I don't really remember are all the details about his disease (it's been a year since I saw the movie) and it's not so important for what I'm aiming at with presenting this on here. It's the morbid way the man expresses his love to the woman, the way he sees her being alive and all beautiful next to him while she's just a rotting corpse in fact. He was so madly in love with her that he was ready to kill her to make her his.
Okay enough with this intro (not. WATCH THE MOVIE if you have the guts for eroguro, it's amazing!!)

Dress (2005)

鏡の前で君とまどろむ 薄紅の指先
その手は不意に弱さを見せて 唇をふさいだ
あの日 君と約束を 交わした
今は二人 想い出せずに
退屈な歌に耳を傾け 窓の外見つめる
僕はドレスをまとい 踊って見せよう
狂ってるかい 教えて
いつか 風にさらわれてゆくだろう
今は二人 想い出せず
僕はなぜ 風の様に雲の様に
あの空へと浮かぶ羽がない なぜ
あの夜へと沈む羽がない ああ
忘れないで 愛あふれたあの日々
君の顔も 想い出せずに
いつか 風にかき消されてゆくだろう
今は二人 想い出せず
僕はなぜ 風の様に雲の様に
あの空へと浮かぶ羽がない なぜ
あの夜へと沈む羽がない ああ
僕はなぜ 風の様に雲の様に
あの空へと浮かぶ羽がない なぜ
今は愛しくて痛みだす ああ

(Kagami no mae de kimi to madoromu, usubeni no yubisaki,
sono te wa fui ni yowasa wo misete, kuchibiru wo fusaida
ano hi kimi to yakusoku wo kawashita
ima wa futari omoidasezu 

taikutsu na uta ni mimi wo katamuke mado no soto mitsumeru
boku wa doresu wo matoi odottemiseyou 
kurutteru kai, oshiete

itsuka kaze ni sarawarete yuku darou
ima wa futari omoidasezu 

boku wa naze kaze no you ni kumo no you ni 

ano sora e to ukabu hane ga nai naze

hoshi no you ni tsuki no you ni subete tsutsumu 
ano yoru e to shizumu hane ga nai 

wasurenaide ai afureta ano hibi

kimi no kao mo omoidasezu ni
itsuka kaze ni kaki kesarete yuku darou
ima wa futari omoidasezu

boku wa naze kaze no you ni kumo no you ni 

ano sora e to ukabu hane ga nai naze

hoshi no you ni tsuki no you ni subete tsutsumu 
ano yoru e to shizumu hane ga nai

boku wa naze kaze no you ni kumo no you ni 

ano sora e to ukabu hane ga nai naze

kono ai mo kono kizu mo natsukashii 
ima wa itoshikute itami dasu...)

(Dozing off with you in front of the mirror, light crimson fingertip
this hand that's suddenly showing weakness, closed the lips
that day we exchanged promises
Now, I don't remember us.
I tend to listen to boring songs and gaze through the window
I put on a dress and show my dance
am I crazy? Tell me.
Perhaps, the wind will wash it away once
Now, I don't remember us.
Why do I, like the wind, like the cloud, 
float in the sky, I don't have wings. Why?
Like the star, like the moon, concealing everything,
that night, I sink into it. I don't have wings. Why?
I can't forget these days overflowed with love
I don't even remember your face.
Perhaps, the wind will delete it all once.
Now, I don't remember us
Why do I, like the wind, like the cloud,
float in the sky. I don't have wings. Why?
Like the star, like the moon, concealing everything
that night, I sink into it. I don't have wings. Why?
Why do I, like the wind, like the cloud,
float in the sky, I don't have wings. Why?
I miss this love and this scar,
and now only the pain is loved...)

I'll get straight to it and set a hypothesis that the guy (the narrator, the singer) has killed his beloved one. First is a picture of them in front of the mirror, which might symbolize the past or his memories. There could even be the possibility that he killed her in front of that mirror that reflected the act, and by that saved the memory of it. Dozing off is also a metaphorical word here, it's the memories of them that are "dozing off", fading away. He can't remember anything. We don't have a straight put picture, but I somehow imagine him standing in front of the mirror with a memory of her. His fingers seem red and hands are shaking, as if there is blood on them. He closes the lips on her body. Or he remembers doing so. 
Even though he can't remember anything, there's one reminder. Her dress. 
By listening to boring music and aimlessly staring through the window, he might be trying to forget everything, and flies away in his empty mind. He feels like he's in the sky, even more, like he IS the sky. With her, maybe?
If you're still wondering why I put the unrelated Rampo story in the beginning-here's the spoiler.
What I'm aiming at with this analysis is the direct reverse of it. 
In Rampo's story-the man is alive and his beloved one is alive with him.
In this story-The beloved one is dead and the man is dead with her.
This is a song about madness. About a man that is already dead, even though his body is still alive.
There's an especially interesting word in the refrain. It's the "naze" (Why) that's sung in the end. Neither in the lyrics text nor the song it feels connected to something. It's just there. On the first, it might seem like questioning the reasons why is he flying when he has no wings, but then again, it doesn't make so much sense when you look closer. The other way it might be understood, is "why don't I have wings", which doesn't really make any more sense either. The "Why" is only there, and I think it should be understood as such. Just as wondering, as a simple question to everything and nothing in particular.  
And the last lines are a bit changed when it comes to lyrics. The love and the scars are gone, as he can't remember anything, they're useless, and there's only pain left to "love". 

Not really my best, I confess. I can't go further with surmising as the text itself is pretty confusing. Japanese can be hard to translate, but I've never run into something that's as indefinite as this one. And for me, that's the beauty of this song.

Special thanks to my always faithful YazooNoDorei, as I would be nowhere near figuring all this out without her <3 

Oh and, one more thing guys. As I have a few requests that are somehow really needless, as the songs are pretty simple and straight-forward, I might put only the translations and a few lines of my thoughts in it. Those will probably be multi-posts. So, now you can request translations only, and if I find the song interesting, I will analyze it. Deal? 

Thursday, May 24, 2012

tiny, not so important notice

Hey guys
Sorry to disappoint, but no analyses today neither
Anyway this is just a little note, just for you to know that I'm alive and I'm craving for some free time to update here, but well, it's the end of school year and I must do my best to keep up with all the things a perfect little high school student has to do.
Also, the thing I mentioned earlier, just today I got a notice that I won 3rd prize in that writing contest, aaand I'm participating in a japanese speaking kind of contest, so I'm pretty much busybusybusy. Those things are during weekends and I have to go to a 3-hr-of-driving far city almost twice a week now, and you know how I used to update this blog on weekends....

Long story short, even though I like to do a translation directly along with analyzing each line before I do the translation of the coming lines (I read a full text once of course, but I don't want to ruin the understanding of a creative process of writing), I'm doing some translations whenever I have some time. Also, DOG inthe PWO's Because Dead lyrics analysis is half done, but I have to study meanings of some political terms used in that song
(yes, I AM ashamed of being 18 and not knowing what exactly bureaucracy is.)

Ohohoh, anyone from Europe going to ACE&Anli Pollicino concerts? You can meet me in Bucharest on 25.July!
(I know I'm probably not the person you dreamed of meeting your whole life, but I swear I'm pretty friendly!!)

I'll be back soon, I promise!

P.S.   REQUEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
p.p.s.    You guys better request or I'm going to spam you with my DOG and Boogieman fandom FOREVER.

Friday, April 20, 2012


Oooh blogger now has a new look! It feels kinda strange writing here but I'll get used to it eventually :D
Long time no post, right... Well I decided to start working on this blog more as I've given up my previous online  voluntary job (as a staff member) just around 20 hours ago so I won't be as busy.
Also, I'm trying out some more serious writing myself, mostly for some school and country organized competitions so it wouldn't be bad to get into analyzing poetry (lyrics) a bit more thoughtfully. I'm writing mostly in my native language so don't worry haha

Anyway, I have a helper now! You know a friend that requested Designer baby and Kohaku, Milica? She turned out to be an extremely smart (talented, whatever) person for analyzing and getting deep into a core of every word of the song, so most you read from now on, I credit to her.
And I want to give her an enormously huge, from the depths of my heart grateful, THANK YOU.

Enough babbling waffling, let's get into some analyzing!

This is a very complicated song. You can see it from both a girl and a boy perspective. Also, I've run into an assumption that it's about a relationship between a musician and his fan, and some words used seriously imply to that. I will try to distance from it as much as I can since it can't really be proven but keep it in mind while reading.
There are lines sung in falsetto (distinguished by italics in the kanji lyrics and in the "quotation marks" in the translation), which most probably represent real dialogues
-in version 1 (a girl perspective)-the lines that she says out loudly
-in version 2 (a boy perspective)-the lines that a girl said to him

Zacro (11.2009.)

(Sarasareta yoru, nakinureta kao.

Tsuki made tooku, madogoshi no yami.

Watashi maru de, shuuen no girlfriend.

Scenario toori odori odorasete.)

(The night I was exposed, my face wet with tears.
Far from the moon, darkness enters through my window.
"It's like I'm the girlfriend of the end of (your) performance."
As per the scenario, dancing, made to dance.)

ver1: She's probably in her bed. "Sarasu" is a word that is often used on online forums, when someone's secret leaks out, so if we take it with that meaning, she was in an inappropriate relationship and they got busted. It's not unusual for a breakup to happen after this "exposing" so it may be a reason for her crying. It goes along with the rest of the lines, where we have "performance" and "scenario" appearing (remember the musician theory?).
However, if we really do distance ourselves from the musician, we get the completely different meaning. It might be SHE who got exposed to that boy, being completely emotionally naked in front of him. She said that "it's like she was the girl of the end of his performance" which might imply that she isn't quite as important to him as he is to her. Going along, she felt like she was his marionette in all of it. She could be dealing with their breakup or simply knowing he uses her for sex or something similar. 
ver2: The similar situation, he's probably in his bed. The theory of the online "exposure" remains pretty much the same. 
Talking about the other possible meaning, it's also pretty much related to the girl version, except that he is the one trapped now. She busted him and what she means to him. 
However. Another thing that I want to point out is that he could have been exposed to his own self, realizing that he is actually really in love with her, and it makes a conflict in himself and confuses him because he's been a "manipulator" and now he can't take control. He wants to continue the way he was before (probably being the macho alpha boy just playing around with girls). Looking at it like this, the second line might be hiding something much more than just pretty words. His "old self" is appearing much further than it was, and something new and scary is coming in all of the sudden. He apparently believes that being that kind of a macho boy is a great thing.

" 穴が空くほど見詰めた時計。
(Ana ga aku hodo mitsumeta tokei.
Sagasu byoushin, modoranai yoru.
Watashi no koe, odoroku hodo yowaku hosoku, sugu ni togireteshimaisou.)
(Looking at my watch so much I could dig a hole in it.

Searching for the second hand, the night that can't turn back.

"My voice, I'm surprised" so weak and thin as if it would cut off at any moment.)

(*the second hand-a thin needle on a clock that's showing seconds)

ver1: Most of this just expresses to what point she's feeling nervous and how much she wants to go back to the past where everything was right. 
There are two things we thought of that she could be surprised because: first is the obvious from the following, of how fragile her voice sounds like (because of crying) 
or she's surprised with what she said previously, how she managed to say it out loudly into his face. 
ver2: Most lines remain meaning the same, except that he wants to "turn back" to his crazy past. Also, seeing the dialogue from the male perspective would more confidently confirm that she was surprised with what she said herself, and she seemed so weak at that moment.

(Samenai hazu no netsu made ubawanaide yo.)
(Don't take away the fever that wasn't supposed to cool down.)

it's intriguing how we can't get what this part means even after tons of thinking, wondering and guessing. 
This makes me think even more that the male version is a more convincing one. 
in ver2 it would probably be related to his "manliness" and how she blames her for "stealing it"
in ver1, a girl would probably refer to what they had together, or what she thought they had.
in both versions, it's obvious that they can't part with their past that was so obviously a bad thing (like a disease) but felt so good.

(Mada nemurenai no.
Rurari, rurari, tokete, kiete, hako no naka.
Mada nokotteru no.
Amaku yureru, anata to watashi no kaori.)
(Once again I can't sleep.

Rurari, rurari, melt, disappear, inside the box.

It still remains,

Sweetly floating, your and my scent.)

it's really not necessary to distinguish this by girl/boy versions, it's pretty much the same. The character is slowly falling asleep, even though (s)he denies it, as everything is getting kinda etheric and mellow. (S)he also starts feeling their scents mixed up again, the way (s)he remembers it. There's an assumption I've read, that the "box" can also mean "a concert hall" (used online too) but I kinda feel it's wrong. The box could simply mean his/her, kinda empty and tired from crying, head, or even just a room he/she's in. I can't find any clue to what "rurari" should mean, but it's probably just a phrase made up to remind of some kind of a lullaby.

(Ima, tsumetaku natteru shiroi sheets ni watashi no e wo kakou.
Aa... anata no kaori, sukoshi zutsu watashi to masette yuku you ni.)
(Now, in the sheets that are becoming cold, I paint a picture of myself.
Aa... it's like your scent and mine mix together bit by bit.)

These lines are said only in the end, and it leads me to thinking that it's a beginning of a dream and the end of the sad night. "Painting a picture" also represents a dream in the making, where he or she feels they're together so realistically that he/she feels the aroma of their time together again. The sheets also show that everything is happening in the bed.
And here comes one more important question. What are the sheets cooling from? From the sweat produced while crying? Do you really think it's just that?
Were they together all along? Are these mixed scents really there, they're not imagined? Were they just "fighting" in bed? Were they making love? 
ver1: If they were making love and he's lying and probably already sound asleep right beside her, we can tell the assumption of she feeling a lot while he's staying cold and uses her just for sex could be very right. 
ver2: If they were making love and she's asleep next to him, that might just be the moment he "exposed to himself" and confessed to himself that he fell in love. Everything seems complicated since the girl is most probably aware she's just another sex toy for him and doesn't expect anything more from him. He thought so too, but...

This was the most interesting analysis I've ever done, I swear! I still can't figure it out completely.

Not sure what I'll do next, but keep your eye on this blog if you like my (our) analyses, and REQUEST, in comments or via twitter  :D

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Matenrou opera-Designer baby

I'm sorry this is taking so long, I was super busy with school. I especially apologize to Milica, who requested this song <3
okay I wasn't THAT busy, but I just couldn't get myself to do it, lately I feel extremely... shallow. I guess that's because I'm watching Pretty little liars lol. I loved the books so much so I really had to see the show too. I had watching marathons for the last few nights, I'd just watch 10 episodes at once. That's more than 7 hours of constant watching of the same teen show a night, hey, I'm sure my brain melted by now.
Oh and guys, I'm using my twitter account again. It's here:
 twittie twittie
feel free to tweet, read, follow, whatever.
You can also tweet me requests if for some reason you can't leave comments here (not sure if you can leave comms without blogspot account, I'm still pretty new to this stuff)

Anyway I've been useless enough for this week, so I better head on to doing some analyzing!

Today I'm doing "Designer baby" and hopefully I will have enough time/will to do Awoi's "Bedroom" by the end of the week. These two songs kinda remind me of eachother because it all happens to be the memories and thoughts of one sleepless night. Designer baby is from a perspective of a lonely child, and Bedroom is from a perspective of a lonely girl. The child in Designer baby is apparently abandoned by his/her parents and Bedroom girl from a boyfriend. I won't reveal too much of my thoughts about Bedroom right now, so enjoy Matenrou opera first^^

Designer baby
lyrics: Sono  music: Sono&Ayame

"眠れない夜 またそばにくる耳鳴りに気づいてしまう
もっと便利に 感情を作ればよかったのに"
(Nemurenai yoru, mata soba ni kuru miminari ni kizuiteshimau
sugureteiru karada ni undekureta no deshou?
motto benri ni kanjou wo tsukureba yokatta no ni)
(Sleepless night, I noticed the buzzing in my ears is starting again
I guess it's born from this excelled body?
It would be so much better if I could produce my feelings)

Ouch, deep and hard words strike from the beginning.
It would be good to take care of the "buzzing in ears" phrase since it naturally brings something more than we'd notice at first. So called "Tinnitus" is a medical condition which happens from disturbed blood pressure in human brain, right? It brings light vertigo with it, you see those weird light spots and sometimes it even ends with nausea (personal experience, I'm very very far from a medicine pro). I believe the full lyrics came from such a condition, since they bring a lot of dark feelings within.
The narrator, a child is tired from everything, that's why I used "excelled". It could also be "worn-out". Yet he can't sleep.
It just didn't fit the style to translate it as "useful", that's the literal meaning, yet I kinda felt "it would be so much better" was so much better haha. So, "it would be so useful to create my feelings" is a bit more literal and a bit less poetic translation. I bet we all feel this way sometimes, so I don't think I should explain this too much. The kid feels everything would be better if he could control his feelings and not feel that sad and lonely at the moment.

"そんな眩しい目で 羨む顔をしないで 
そんな悲しい目で 哀れむ顔をしないで 
羨望の眼差しも 自己欲に浸る優しさも 
いらない ただ 僕に触れて" 
(sonna mabushii me de, urayamu kao wo shinai de 
sonna kanashii me de, awaremu kao wo shinai de. 
Senbou no manazashi mo, jikoyoku ni hitaru yasashisa mo 
iranai, tada, boku ni furete)
(With those dazzling eyes, don't make your envy face
with those sad eyes, don't make your pity face.
the gaze of envy, the kindness soaked in greed,
I don't need them. Just, touch me.)

I don't think this is addressed to the parent, it feels more like this child is talking to his surroundings, the whole world, everyone who pretend to pity or envy him. It's just the "kindness soaked in greed" that reveals this so directly, even though you can see it from the first two lines too. In his eyes, every kindness toward him is actually selfish and greed filled action.
However, I am really not sure what to think about these last words he says here. It could be that he wants them to experience his feelings, to understand him (the other possible meaning of a verb)

(Oyasumi nasai 
Mata ashita mo kitaidoori no boku de iru yo 
ii ko nette kikitai kara 
demo sonna hibi mo mou sugu owari 
Boku ha boku wo torimodosu) 
Like always, I'll have hope tomorrow again,
because I want to ask if I'm a good child... 
But those days too will be over soon. 
I'm taking myself back)

This feels addressed more to his parents than anybody else. Everyday he wakes up and tries so hard to impress them, to gain their love in some way, just wanting to get kind words, appreciation and attention, that every child should get. But the "like always" and "again" show that he's been trying and trying but could never reach that. To be completely honest, I added the "like always" part because, in the lyrics there are two expressions, for "again" and "also", so it would be just "again tomorrow also" but it isn't right in any possible way I guess. However, I don't think it would feel right without the "like always" because, well, it's just I kinda feel what should be there. 
The last two lines are leading to something awful. A suicide.
"I'm taking myself back", or "I'm regaining myself" might seem a bit strange in english, but in japanese it makes sense, and there's no other meaning that I can think of other than a suicide. "I'm taking my life" would be a closer expression I guess.

"盲目に従順に ただ素直な僕が欲しいんですか? 
ありがとう と言えばあなた方は僕を見てくれますか? 
(Moumoku ni juujun ni tada sunao na boku ga hoshiin desu ka? 
Arigatou to ieba anatagata wa boku wo mitekuremasu ka? 
Eien no miminari ga boku no kodou wo kakikesu mae ni, 
kono asphalt no umi  ni shizumete)
(I guess you blindly obediently want me to be obedient?
If I say "thank you", will you finally look at me? 
Before the endless buzzing in my ears erases my heartbeat, 
I sink into this sea of asphalt)

These are not only hard to translate, but really hard to understand too. 
There could be a meaning that he's talking about social "rules" and people who blindly follow them. This kind of people can never understand the people who are not like them, who fight for their freedom. 
A "Thank you" could be just a sarcastic gratitude towards people (possibly parents) who either made him stronger or killed inside the poor child by ignoring him when he needed gentleness. 
He is sure he will die that very moment, from all the overflowing emotions. 
"The asphalt sea" is such an beautiful phrase, I can't stop reading it again and again. 
It could mean two things:
the simple meaning I get is that it represents the huge expanse of hard, cold asphalt, the way the kid sees the whole world. 
the other meaning could be that he has mixed feelings, that something he thought would be so gentle and transparent as water is actually so hard and unbreakable. It again represents the world seen through the eyes of a child who discovers how this world really is.  
Whatever meaning you like more, we could sum it all into the same conclusion-he let the harsh world finally eat him up.

どこにもない 僕がいない 
("Kore kara" "Ima made"
Dokonimonai boku ga inai
Owaru koto ga boku no hajimari)
("After this", "Until now"
I'm not in either. 
The end is my beginning.)

He won't exist after this, but he didn't really exist before either. It's just the dead or alive body that is different, he feels his soul died a long time ago. However he sees some kind of a salvation in death, where he will finally be peaceful. 

I must confess I cried a river while doing this. It feels just so... I don't know... it's so sad, seeing the world without any hope or happiness through this song. It's amazing. Thanks for requesting it, Milica! 

I guess next is: Awoi-Bedroom

Sunday, March 25, 2012

The Kiddie-4F9

Finally a new post! A bit lighter and happier but nothing less meaningful song this time! 4F9 by The Kiddie.

I should start with the name of the song. Yusa's birthday is 9th April (a day before mine <3) so we have 4th month F 9th day. When written and read in japanese, it can be Shi-Fu-Ku (至福) which means supreme bliss or beatitude. The word is mentioned in the end so I think that's it.

So, let's begin:

Noah (15.April 2009.)


"ねぇ、聞いて 悩んで痛んで決めた事なの
僕らの未来へ終止符を 僕らの手で突き刺すんだ"
(Nee, kiite, nayande iyande kimeta koto na no,
koukai nante nokosanai you ni,
bokura no mirai he no shuushifu wo  bokura no te de tsukisasunda)
(Hey, listen, is worrying and being hurt a decision
made in order not to leave things like regret behind?
With our hands we thrust a full-stop on our future)

In most translations I've seen, it says: "is worrying and hurting just a given?". I'm not sure what to think of it. "Kimeta koto" really is a confusing phrase since there's no person who performs the action. It can be translated as an "already decided thing (as-fate)" or as "something we've decided". And just that little detail changes the meaning drastically. However, a third line in this stanza gives me the little hint that the translations I've read weren't right, and that it's actually US who decide to feel that way. That third line is a very strong one, he mentions "us" twice which isn't the usual behavior of japanese language. 
What shouldn't be understood wrongly is the third line and "putting a full-stop our future". It took a long time for me to understand this. The particle used here is vital. It's  へ (he/e), which indicates moving towards something. So we finish and block the regrets (and similar things) from our future in order to make it better, and not block our future as it can be understood after just a fast reading of a text. So basically, these first lines of a song, put in simple words: we decide to take the trouble of worrying and being hurt right now, because we don't want to leave the bad feelings for the future.

"でも、なんで? 反対に走り出したみたい
変かな? 最後にはもう喚くしかないのかな?"
(demo, nande? Hantai ni hashiridashita mitai
risei tobikoe senaka osu shoudo ga tomerarenai
hen kana? saigo ni wa mou wameku shikanai no kana?)
(But, why? It seems like we start running backwards
jumping over the reason, unable to stop the impulses that push our backs,
is it weird? will we have no other choice but to cry in the end?)

It really might seem that we are making our future better by worrying now, but what about the present? Problems always occur and because of it we're always so distracted from enjoying this very moment. We "start running backwards" (make no good progress) because we're always feeling bad for this or that, which doesn't really solve anything. Ignoring the "reasonable" thing to do (solving whatever it is), we follow our impulse to worry and question&review the possible solutions. So, knowing this, really, WHY? "Is it weird" to know you yourself are doing this but never really realize it while doing it? So worrying and not actually solving anything all the time just pile up our worries and in the end we're so lost and really don't have an idea what to do, so we just sit in the corner, cry and pity ourselves? 

"嫌だよ 僕は此処にいたいんだ
君もそうでしょ? 顔にでかっく書いてある
大きな夢より今を抱きしめたい ただ今を願うよ"
(Iya da yo, boku wa koko ni itainda
kimi mo sou desho? kao ni dekakku kaitearu
ooki na yume yori ima wo dakishimetai, tada ima wo negau yo)
(It's so unpleasant. I want to be here
You too, don't you? It's written hugely on your face
more than a big dream I want to embrace the present, I wish only the "now")
*this part repeats with no changes

Hard time translating "Iya da yo", I must confess. I don't think there's a good expression for that in english. It's something like saying "oh no" or "too bad", but not even quite like that. Learning Japanese, you'll get just a feeling for this expression, I really don't know how to explain it. Sorry for that lol
Anyway. I don't think these lines require a lot of explaining. It's pretty clear what Yusa wanted to say, having the previous in mind. There's a good explanation for the last phrase "tada ima" from : "Yusa’s playing with words here ... giving the phrase a double meaning of “right now” and “I’m home”, an expression one would normally greet people with when returning home. Both are formed by the same syllables but said slightly differently." 
a deleted part is "writing the kanji in hiragana" which might be a mistake since it's the opposite, writing the part normally in hiragana with kanji. The rest is just perfect! 

その瞳の奥の奥に焼き付けて ずっと置いておいて
時間よ止まれ いつまでも 君と笑い合ってたいんだ"
(Sayonara wa ienai kurai ni daite yo
sono me no oku no oku ni yakitsukete, zutto oite oite,
sayonara wo iwanai de ii you ni
jikan yo tomare, itsumademo, kimi to waraiattetainda)
(Hug so much that I can't say goodbye
Print it in the deepest depths of these eyes, so that it always stays there
do it so that it's okay not to say goodbye 
stop the time, forever, I want to laugh with you)

Judging from the previous, the "embrace" mentioned in a chorus is referring to "the present", and not any particular person. However in the last line of the chorus we again see there's another person beside him in that moment. Since, as I've mentioned numerous times before, japanese doesn't use grammatical person often, it's very hard to decide whether Yusa wants to "hug and stay in that moment forever" or "be hugged by the other person". The following lines suggest that it's possibly the first version, having the very moment printed inside his eyes (I believe he wanted to say "brain" actually, but it isn't really poetic, isn't it?) and never forget it. Just like people, moments and happenings are alive for as long as we remember it.


"潔しをウリとするくらい ジメジメしたのは苦手だから
フラッと出掛けるよ ちょっと煙草買いに行くノリで
ココロに太陽を抱いて 雨の日も長い夜も
大丈夫さ 怖くないからさ"
(Isagiyoshi wo uru to suru kurai, jimejimeshita no wa nigate dakara
furatto dekakeru yo chotto tabako kai ni iku nori de
kokoro ni taiyou wo daite ame no hi mo nagai yoru mo
daijoubu sa kowakunai kara sa)
(To the extent that I'd sell my pride, I am awful when being gloomy, so
I aimlessly go out, like "just to buy cigarettes"
when you keep the Sun in your heart, a rainy day and a long night,
are alright, because you're not afraid)

Well the bridge now tells a different story, and if we go back, we can sum up the whole song in just this. It's written very directly, so I don't think there's need to analyze too much. Well, don't take it too seriously, and I'm sure you'll know what he means.

何年何光年先の☆でも ずっと持って追って
ココロの奥の奥で いつまでも みんな笑い合ってるんだもん"
(Sayonara ni sayonara shitara modoru yo
nannen, nan kounen saki no hoshi demo, zutto motte otte
sayonara wa iwanai de iinda
kokoro no oku no oku de, itsumademo, minna waraiatterun damon)
(If you say goodbye to a goodbye, it'll come back,
always holding and running after a star of how many years, how many light years away,
it's alright not to say goodbye
in the deepest depths of your heart, always, everyone is laughing)

oh look! a star! ☆☆☆!
The first line is a bit confusing, yet it's very simple. I think it's just about throwing away a personal habit of making farewells, because we really do carry all the precious people and moments in our hearts forever (the last line). A star probably symbolizes dreams, love and passion we hold and always chase after. 

"今日という日が そう いつまでも至福でありますように。"
(Kyou to iu hi ga, sou, itsumademo shifuku de arimasu you ni.)
(This very day, keep it as a beatitude forever)

So, here's the name of a song ^^ 
And this last line adds up to the importance of the today, of the right now that is only now and never again. It suggests that there aren't any super-special moments of your life you should keep in your memory and heart forever, but that everything is equally important. Be happy that you're where you are, be happy because you're alive, because, well, that's our greatest bliss.

I give this song 5/5 stars ^-^ ☆☆☆☆☆
This used to be my favorite song back in 2009, and I'm so glad I did this. I should probably do some more happy sounding songs, I felt kinda gloomy after my previous two analyses... Oh I love The Kiddie <3

(next to come, requested-Matenrou opera-Designer baby)

Saturday, March 17, 2012

D'espairsRay-琥珀 (Kohaku)

Oh I got my first request already! ^o^
Made by a friend, truth to be said, and on facebook. But definitely a headstart for this blog, I'd say ^--^ thanks Milica!
Anyway what I forgot to mention is that I make these analyses directly, with just once read lyrics before I start doing line by line. The main reason is that, knowing how lyrics and poems are usually made, I want to follow the flow of thoughts of the writer, not the general finished work, which, I must confess, when it comes to my own songs, ends up as something a bit different than what I wanted it to be.
So, getting on to this:


Redeemer (11.March 2009)

琥珀 (Amber)

悲しみを秘めた顔で笑っていた... "
(Tokai ni uzumoreta
kimi wa marude maigo no you
kanashimi wo himeta kao de waratteita...")
(Hidden in the city
you are completely alike to a lost child,
laughed with a face that was hiding sorrow...)

This is a very metaphorical part, and a great introduction into the song. If we manage to imagine the city as a human soul, and a human soul as a reflection of the outer world (the city), it's very easy to understand these lines. There's a reason for using the phrase "lost child", with "child" as an essence-a person lost in, or still exploring this world, and their own soul. It also explains a bit why the girl is laughing and smiling, trying to hide her true feelings. It indicates that she is a fearful person, that doesn't seem to understand this world yet.

(Nanimokamo shinjirarezu ni sasayaita
"daremo inai..."
kayowaku togireta hosoi koe)
(believing nothing you murmured
"no one is here..."
with a frailly interrupted thin voice)

With this quote we find out that the reason the person's soul is filled with sorrow is loneliness. There's nobody and nothing to believe in. The quoted sentence is not finished either. No one is there to do what? Most probably, to give her support, to give her strength to carry on, according to the following line which expresses her weakness.

"抱きしめたい 悲しみが君を覆い尽くすなら
(Dakishimetai, kanashimi ga kimi wo ooi tsukusu nara
hageshisa de tokashite miseyou)
(I want to embrace you, if sorrow covers you
I shall dissolve it intensely)
*this is the refrain, it repeats with unimportant changes, such as word tints that can't be expressed through english

This was a very hard line to translate. "Ooi tsukusu" doesn't really exist as a phrase (I know of). "Ooi" is a cover, a mantle, and "tsukusu" is "to exhaust" or "to serve to something". I want to try to explain the "cover" I used, as it must be understood as a very serious word, much stronger than the usual "cover" or "conceal"-"If it completely conceals you", or "if it serves as a mantle that hides you". Also, the "intensely" I used can also be translated as "violently", but I believe it just means "I should devote myself to it".
So if we understand it like that, the line makes a much deeper meaning. "I want to embrace you, because I know that you're hiding your true self because you're afraid, but you don't have to fear me, and I will devotedly work on gaining your trust, and opening you up, dissolving your coating." These lines literally scream "you can trust me", in a good way, of course. Actually, I believe these are the gentlest and warmest lines I've heard in my life, it's just so beautiful...

ひとつふたつ... また失う"
(Kakegae no nai mono
hitotsu futatsu... mata ushinau)
(Irreplaceable things
once, twice... and losing again)

A reasonable reason for a person to stop believing, for losing hope. She is repeatedly losing things that are precious to her, in either a material or abstract world of her mind, and naturally she starts fearing what will happen next, she becomes afraid of everything that has any power to hurt her or take something away.

(Nemuranai kono machi ni hoshi wa kazarenai)
(Stars aren't decorating this sleepless town)

Beautiful line. Again we come across the "city" phenomenon, the connection of her soul and her surroundings. Going along with the previous sentence, stars would be her precious possessions, and there's nothing to shine and decorate her soul as she's lost it all.

(Itsukara bokura no koe wa
nukumori wo ushinatta
kizutsuku bakari no sekai dakara)
(How long ago have our voices
lost their warmth
because of this world that only wounds?)

Now Hizumi takes us into a wide picture. It's not just the two of them who've lost the warmth in their voices and gentleness in their words, but the whole world and humanity. People only hurt each other, and have, with a valid reason, lost the ability to trust each other. So the person he sings about in the whole song could just be a reflection of the general human fate, the world we're all doomed to live in.

"寄り添って 悲しみをこの身深く刻んで
(Yorisotte, kanashimi wo kono mi ni fukaku kizande
kizuato ga moetsukiru made)
(getting close together, while sorrow is deeply carving into this body
until the scars burn out)

There's not much to say about this sentence, except that it indicates the strength of the pain she is feeling-so strong that it carves into the body, making deep scars.

恐れずに... 心は傍にいるから"
(Kokoro to wa urahara no kotoba wa mou iranai
osorezu ni, kokoro wa soba ni iru kara)
(Unneeded are the words that are contrary to the heart,
don't be afraid... Because our hearts are close together)

Again we come across the importance of the outer world to the human, and the contrary to it importance to keep in touch with inner human qualities in a harsh world. These lines are much more closely connected to the "How long ago have our voices lost their warmth because of this world that only wounds?" than latter lines. So we get back to the big picture of a world with the two of them in a center of it all, deciding not to give in to the surroundings, deciding to trust each other.


"星の無い空の下 今も震える君に
(Hoshi no nai sora no shita ima mo furueru kimi ni
kikasetai yoake no uta wo...
misetai kono sekai no hikari wo...)
(Under the sky without stars, To you who are still shaking
I want to sing this song of the dawn...
I want to show you the light of this world...)

She is still shaking, but Hizumi is showing her that there is something beautiful to this world, like the daybreak that is coming. He wants to show her that there is hope. These beautiful lines are leading us to a happy ending.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Introductory post+Boogieman-Recurrence

So hi there ^^
I'm not sure if I can make this blog what I want it to be, but here's my idea put in simple language:
You know how we always do profound analysis of poems and songs in school classes? I want to do it for Visual kei lyrics I find interesting. I want to get deep into the brain of the lyrics writer, and get good assumption, if not the true meaning of what's behind the lyrics. I plan on doing this by analyzing line by line, translating it directly.
I'm still just a high school third grade student, but I don't think this is an impossible task ^^

Oh, and, you can feel free to give me requests and suggestions ^o^

Starting off with Boogieman's Recurrence. Not the happiest jumpiest song to start with, but definitely a good example of what I want to do in the future.

Libido (21.January 2009.)
lyrics: Junno, music: Yuana

(saigo ni mita kimi no kao, sabishige de utsumuku
koukai wa hi no hikari wo saegiri kage wo otosu)
(The last (time I've) seen your face, looking down in loneliness,
regret interrupts, casts shadow on the sunlight.)

First of all, the tenses used in this stanza are kinda confusing. Junno starts with past tense, which supports the rest of the lyrics, but then suddenly switches to infinitive. It makes me believe the "sunlight" actually represents the other person's usual personal traits, the optimism and cheerfulness that are now overshadowed by regret and loneliness. By the "shadow cast over the sunlight", he might think of something alike to solar eclipse, the eclipse that happened on that someone's heart. Regret is a very strong word here, because the other possible translation would be repentance, and not something like sadness for the things that can't be helped. So the person is the one guilty for the way he or she (I'll use she from now on, but I'm not sure who is this song addressed to) feels. The fact that she is "looking down" is supporting the assumption.

(kawaribae no nai hibi wa "furikaeruna" to unagasu)
(days without changes for the better are warning "not to look back")

I must note that "furikaeruna" (don't look back) is used as a strong prohibition mood, a negative imperative, so I felt that "warn" is a better word to use than "urge" or "suggest".
This line might be the vital point of the song. Yet it's impossible for me to figure out if Junno thinks of himself or the person to whom the song is dedicated. Japanese is like that, I guess.
But what I can figure out is that it, besides supporting the "regret" I talked about, indicates the strong fear of what has happened/was done in the past. It might also explain the name of the song very well. In the following parts of the song, we can see that the fear is felt not only towards the past, but the future too, with only a minimal inkling of hope. It explains the general gloomy feeling of the melody and the song itself very well.
The future doesn't seem brighter, the days keep on coming and going in the same sorrowful mood and from that, (I might be jumping into conclusions now) the "don't look back" is an opposite of the "what doesn't kill me-makes me stronger".
Another meaning might be that (long gone) past was a good one, and that remembering those times will be painful for the beholder. This theory is a bit more convincing one, because of the rest of the song. The future isn't promising, and one is aware that it's impossible to bring back the happiness that was back then.

"色褪せた君を手にし、眺める事が罪でも・・・ "
(Iroaseta kimi wo te ni shi, nagameru koto ga tsumi demo...)
(In hand holding the discolored you, overlooking is a crime, but...)

In this line it's obvious that Junno is the one who performs the action.
Something here makes me think he feels a bit superior to the one he's "holding in his hand", he feels pity for the person who is "fading". The person who was once alike to the "sunlight" (first stanza), but who is now dying inside. I'd rather translate the "overlooking" or "gazing at" as "staring", but that's just not the word used. However I have a strong feeling he wanted to use mitsumeru (stare) but it just sounded too harsh. It really feels like a crime or a sin to stare at someone you can't help, doesn't it?

(utsurikawaru kisetsu no naka, kimi wo omou yo
shirokuro ni aseta omoide wo taguri yose)
(In the changing seasons, I think of you,
pulling in the last moves on memories that faded into black and white)

The first line of this part might not be so important for the song itself, but it's noting that Junno is not having any negative feeling towards the other person which couldn't be 100% confirmed from the previous.
The other line has a lot of feelings in it. Like the person, memories also got discolored. It could be because he can't watch her the same way he did before, she lost her charming colors and memories of how the past was were affected by it. Again I wasn't sure how to translate, this time the line's predicate. "Pulling in" is as in "pulling the rope", and "the last moves" are as in the game of, eg chess, the conclusion of everything. Their together memories are coming to an end, possibly by force. The force might be the reason for her regret. Further speculations would be too much, I think.

(ikuoku no hoshi no moto, boku wa inoru yo
"hikari afureru hibi wo" to...)
(under how many hundreds of millions stars, I pray
"days overflowed by light"...)

The hope that future might get better reflects here. The enormous number of stars probably have the meaning of how much he wishes the prayer will come true.
The second and the last sentence of the song, his prayer, is not finished. It leaves the opportunity to make our own meaning to the whole song. Does he want those beautiful days of the past back? Or does he just hope he can find light in his life again? Really, if you think of it, each ending would make the whole song completely different. That's the beauty of unfinished, it leaves the space to put our own feelings to it and relate to the song better.